Book Review
'Compendium of Kinder Tales and Poems', Habeas Liecich, price 1 Galleon, at all good book stores
Martha Hogehelm
As compendiums go, this is one of the most thorough and richly illustrated guides to any single magical creature. Before reading this work, I would not have believed that there was such a trove of lore known about Kinders and their habits to tell. Secretive, moving at a speed the human eye finds too fast to follow, they have remained a mystery even to wizards, but this book, by Habeas Liecich, is full of new and old information that truly brings the Kinder to life in one's living room!
Including the classic stories and poems about Kinder sightings, one of which is reproduced below, as well as updated Creature Hunter tales and mesmerisingly drawn pictures, it is worth every knut of its price of 1 Galleon. A bargain!
The Kinder's kinder mistake
Twas Tuesday, when I saw it again
Once previously that mischievous face had come into my life
The very same day, the year before, I were certain of it
A thin, pointed face peering around my garden gate
Now it was here again, shy but as solid as you or I
Sneaking a glance over to the tomato patch
A Kinder is the scourge of thieves,
My grandmother always said
They leave nothing for thieves to find!
If there were more Kinders, wouldn't that be a wonderful way to rid the world of burglars, I used to think!
But this Kinder of mine, it had not crossed the threshold
I wondered why it was so shy
Had it lost the thieving ways of its kind?
I set to watch, hidden in the bramble brush
And presently it wandered in
Looking at all the fare my little garden had to offer it
Carrots and beans, potatoes and turnips
It passed over those and mayhaps thinking no one was there to notice
Pulled up the tomato plants whole, one after another
Then ran out of the garden with them before I could lay my hands on the scamp!
I stood over the scene of the crime, rueing my empty tomato patch
It had not left a single fruit ne'er to seed again
But as I looked at the brown earth, all ribbed up
I saw an amazing sight
Two Kinder eggs buried in the soil where the tomato plant had been!
Now I would have Kinders of my own
And if the myths and tales all be true
I would soon be the richest man in the world!
For it is said even by the wisest, that Kinders always bury their treasure where they are born!